Here it is – 2014, the Text Adventure!
You are in the EU. Your quality of life is decent but you are irritated with the number of foreigners and the level of taxation. Exits are W, N, E, SE, S, SW. What do you do? > Go W You find yourself confronted by a heavily armed policeman shouting at you to lie on the floor. What do you do? > Put hands up You have been shot. You are dead. GAME OVER Would you like to go back to your last saved game? > Y You are in the EU. Your quality of life is decent but you are irritated with the number of foreigners and the level of taxation. Exits are W, N, E, SE, S, SW. What do you do? > Go N You have fallen into a giant supervolcano. You are dead. GAME OVER Would you like to go back to your last saved game? > Y You are in the EU. Your quality of life is decent but you are irritated with the number of foreigners and the level of taxation. Exits are W, N, E, SE, S, SW. What do you do? > Go E You find yourself in a war zone. All around you are shattered buildings and piles of rubble. You see a convoy of white lorries. What do you do? > ask for help The lorries had Spetsnaz special forces inside them! You have been shot. You are dead. GAME OVER Would you like to go back to your last saved game? > Y You are in the EU. Your quality of life is decent but you are irritated with the number of foreigners and the level of taxation. Exits are W, N, E, SE, S, SW. What do you do? > Go SE You find yourself in a city without electricity or water. There seem to be a lot of ruins. There are explosions all around you. Next to you is a school run by the UN. What do you do? > Enter school You find yourself with a group of women and children. A tank shell blasts through the classroom wall. You are all roasted in a fireball. You are dead. GAME OVER Would you like to go back to your last saved game? > Y You are in the EU. Your quality of life is decent but you are irritated with the number of foreigners and the level of taxation. Exits are W, N, E, SE, S, SW. What do you do? > Go S You have been kidnapped by a group of men dressed entirely in black, but they are not ninjas. One of them has a videocamera. He speaks to you in an East End accent. What do you do? > Ask for help The man with the East End accent makes a speech to the camera and cuts off your head. You are dead. GAME OVER Would you like to go back to your last saved game? > Y You are in the EU. Your quality of life is decent but you are irritated with the number of foreigners and the level of taxation. Exits are W, N, E, SE, S, SW. What do you do? > Go SW You catch Ebola. You are dead. GAME OVER Would you like to go back to your last saved game? > Y You are in the EU. Your quality of life is decent but you are irritated with the number of foreigners and the level of taxation. Exits are W, N, E, SE, S, SW. What do you do? > wait You are still in the EU. Your Prime Minister calls a referendum. You can vote YES to leave or NO to stay. What do you vote? > NO You are in a minority. Your country leaves the EU. GAME OVER (Inspired by Rob Fahey)
You are in the EU. Your quality of life is decent
but you are irritated with the number of foreigners
and the level of taxation. Exits are W, N, E, SE, S, SW.
What do you do?
Say PLUGH
You are standing at the end of a road before a small brick
building. Around you is a forest. A small stream flows out
of the building and down a gully.